sabine | Declaring update amnesty (Reply)

Things keep happening that I want to write about, but then time and energy go away and I say "I'll write it tomorrow". And then tomorrow comes and goes by so very fast and, once again, I'm left with my list of Cool/Distressing Things and no words to show for it. And then I start getting a guilt loop complex and into a pattern where if I haven't written and now it's too late to write and the list is still long and I don't have time and ARGH.

So. Amnesty. Forgiveness. Gentleness. Here are some things from lately. They're not exactly chronological and there might not be much context. But a list of things makes a post and I'm going to go with that.

Halloween was spectacular. Emi dressed up as Queen Elsa. Ox was a knight in fleecy armor. I made both costumes and the kiddos LOVED them. On Thursday, my work had a "bring kids to trick or treat around offices" event. The kids had a ball and made out LIKE BANDITS. So much candy. On Friday, they went out around town with Daddy and I stayed home to mind the candy bowl. It was FREEZING cold, so they (and all the other kids) were bundled up. The highlight for Ox was going INTO the fire station for treats and getting to see the trucks. Emi liked being out and about. Both kids were thrilled with the full-size, not cheap flashlights that the EMTs were handing out. I love our town so much.
I had a lot of candy left over in my office from the office trick-or-treating. To avoid the temptation (and since I have a TON of candy at home), I dumped it all in the break room. I wasn't the only one to do that. It was all gone by lunch. Nice.
The time change is messing with me. It's dark so early that it's giving me the mental state of "never going to be light ever again". Stupid SAD. Blessed lightbox.
Au's son's birthday party at the Children's Museum was awesome! The kids ran around, played, ran around, played, played, and played. It was kind of zooey (other events going on that day and bigger kids who didn't always look where they were going), but so much playing. Ox conked out in the car and took a solid nap. Emi was in bear mode and wouldn't nap, rest, or stop whining. Ugh.
Werk is still of the crazy.
- I have a new project that I didn't really want to do, but I need to do because customer. It's going to be fine, but since I got told to do it instead of expressing my creativity and problem-solving skillz, it doesn't seem like the fun thing I wanted it to be. Sigh.
- I had a quick one-day trip to Peoria for a customer thing. We were at the convention center at 7 am on Wednesday. At 2:20, I got a text from my ride saying that they were done for the day, so they were going to spend some time over at the hospital and be back to get me by 5. I was done at 2:23. They had my bag in their car. I found a ride with another group and just told my original ride to hold on to my bag and I'd get it from them on Thursday, since we were going to make it back to town 1-3 hours before them and I wasn't going to sit around and wait. Grrr.
- I still get anxiety flares just by walking in the door, but it's not a full-on panic like during those couple of weeks in October. That was a bad time.
- Atul Gawande (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atul_Gawande) came to our work to speak as part of the Wisconsin Book Festival. It was totally amazing. He can come back every month to talk to us about healthcare and how the real world works.
My Hogswatch sewing/craft projects are coming along nicely. I have the sewing things either all lined up and most are awaiting final sewing. One thing is already done and hidden, since Emi wanted it for her own. Of course. I have a cross stitch project that I don't know if it'll get done, mostly because of time and sitting still to do it. Emi wants to "help" with it, so that's a thing.
Dance class is back on schedule. Tribal T came to class last night and it was lovely to see her. We also started a happy not-too-bouncy dabke choreography. It's a short song and there's already a repeat for the chorus. It's a nice change of brain from the last complicated number.
Depression is ramping up and anxiety seems to be ramping down. I think. Again, it's dark all the time and it makes me sad, but I don't feel terribly panicked about it. So that's nice.
This coming weekend is TeslaCon. Again, we're not going because kids. The next weekend is both Newer Dancer Night and Northern Lights. We're not going because my grandparents are celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary, so we all have to be there.
I've been reading some good books lately. Of these, the best was clearly "The Ghost Bride" by Yangsze Choo. It has magic, ghosts, spiritual journeys, espionage, and growing up. I enjoyed it far more than I was expecting and highly recommend it. I've also been listening to "The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making" again. It's comforting and beautiful and so very wonderful. I love it and it loves me back.
I have an appointment on Sunday for my birthday tattoo. My mom's going to HATE it. I care not. I love it.