Jul. 13th, 2011 03:32 pm
sabine: (Default)
Brain about to fall out of head. I have 46 days left until I get to meet my son and I feel like I'm not getting things done fast enough.

Things like: buy wicks, fuel, and safety gear. Spinning fire is amazing, wonderful, and filled a hole in my life that I hadn't been aware of. Things like: fill out your darn pre-admit form for having the baby at Local Hospital. Things like: work on the projects around the house that you've promised you'd have done. Things like: keep the house and yard looking like adults live there. You know, some random and unimportant things like that.

Existing project list:
  • Downwood - Vest: All fabric cut, all lining cut, all interfacing ironed in. Ready to sew.
  • Emi - Chef coat: Done. So freaking adorable.
  • Downwood - Giant brown coat of doooom: Two seams, two hems, 7 button holes, and 7 buttons left to sew. Looks good.
  • Galieth - Shirt: Done sewing. Needs grommets
  • Galieth - Coat: Fabric located. Most of the pattern cut out, but some pieces remaining.
  • Galieth - Vest: Fabric located, pattern cut out. Ready to iron, then cut fabric.
  • Bex - Bodice: Fabric located, pattern cut out. Ready to iron, then cut fabric.
  • Bex - Skirt: Fabric located, potential pattern proposed. Holding.
  • Bex - Coat: Pattern located, not yet cut. Fabric not yet located. Holding.
  • Emi - Fluffy pillows: Furry white and fluffy pink are done.
  • Emi - Curtains: Done! Blue fabric from stash combined with cute dinosaur print makes curtains for her Big Girl Room that she loves. They also make the room dark enough that she'll sleep in there now. WIN!
sabine: (pooch and percival snoozing)
Last Monday started out as pretty much every other Monday this year has gone. I grumble when my alarm goes off, let the dog out, fix some cereal, feed the dog, and sit in front of my light box while reading Facebook, Twitter, or webcomics. True, it was Peanut's due date, but since she hadn't made so much as a peep of wanting to escape, I updated Facebook that I wasn't expecting to have the child.

I went to take a shower and noticed quite a lot of bloody show. I was immediately concerned, but since they'd told me to both expect it and that it could be several days yet before true labor, I tried to not worry. That resolve lasted about as long as it takes to wash my hair. I decided to call Triage to get their opinion, just to make sure.

They said to come in, just in case.
This got really long and somewhat descriptive. FYI )
sabine: (Ball-cap cartoon)
According to my doctor, I am doing very well. My uterus is the right size, my weight is appropriate, I have a very active baby with good heart tones (150 bpm), and my blood pressure has remained relatively constant throughout this whole thing. Also, having reached 37 weeks, he has few worries about Peanut being born any time now.

Woot, I say, woot!

According to my greyhound, I am either the best doggy mommy or the worst in the history of the entire world. She was not given any of my Taco Bell last night nor was she given any of the cheese or garlic from the lasagna that we prepped for the freezer tonight. Woe is her. On the other hand, she has a yard that she will sprint across, roll in the grass, and play! And she gets tons of other treats and people food. She had a minor freakout on Sunday when Downwood was vacuuming her lawn (mowing it), but was ecstatic when I let her out so she could roll around and verify that the grass was still there. Silly dog.

According to my freezer, I am ready for an extended blizzard. There's fruit and veggies, BBQ pork, lasagna, meats, bread, cookie dough, and some other things that I can't remember right now. We also bought a whole bunch of pantry staples (canned tomatoes, beans, flour, sugar, pasta, etc) to restock all the things that I made a point of using up before the move. Aside from things like milk, eggs, and bananas, I think we're set for a while.

According to my team lead, I am doing a very good job at work. He's talked to my customers and heard all the good things they have to say about me. He also got involved with an escalation over the last few days and has been helpful in balancing my work load.

According to my dance teacher, I am going to have few problems pushing Peanut out. Hooray for core muscle strength! Also, I am very brave for doing a full-day dance workshop on Saturday. It was an amazing time and I learned a whole lot! I was sad that I hadn't signed up for the Sunday workshop as well, but realized that my body probably wouldn't have stood for it.

According to our former neighbor, some of the random kids were running in and out of our rental place over the weekend. He saw it, shooed them out, collected the few valuables (ie, the liquor cabinet) that were left in the place (the bottle of Templeton Rye being among them), and called the landlord to let them know what was going on. The landlords, being complete idiots, didn't tell this to Downwood when he called them to report a break-in. Luckily, the neighbor showed up before the police did and could give them his statement. The whiskey has been rescued and brought to its new home.

According to my psychiatrist, one of the reasons that I've been barely maintaining my grip on reality is because my blood level of one of my meds was just a hair above the minimum level required for functionality. There's something about having an extra liter of blood that dilutes blood levels of drugs. Dosage has been changed and we are continuing to monitor mood and thought patterns. Still not in a good place, but still able to keep moving.

According to my back and to Peanut, I need to not be sitting in front of my computer any longer. In fact, either chilling in the ultra-comfy rocking chair or just getting a little extra sleep are both sounding like excellent ideas.
sabine: (Rocks fall)
House update
75% of the Really Heavy boxes have been moved. All hail Downwood, Phil, and Aaron for moving them! That means that all my books, all Downwood's books from the spare room, and all the gaming books that were in the living room are now in the new place. Still to be moved are all the gaming books from the basement library.

Also, the front living room has been painted. My camera needs new batteries, but once that's taken care of, I can snag some pictures. Yes, it was the easiest room to do, but we wanted to have something done that we could cross off the list. It looks pretty snazzy.

Still to move: Kitchen, furniture, clothing, pictures, and all the miscellaneous crap still lying around. Still to paint: Two walls in Peanut's room, all walls in master bedroom, and the chalkboard wall in the kitchen.

Peanut update
Yesterday marked 33 weeks. Due to laundry issues, I had to wear a different tank top than usual to dance class last night. It's a bit more form-fitting than what I'd been wearing and I'm more spherical than I was. My instructor looked at me and asked how long I had to go. Upon hearing that the EDD is 7 weeks, she shook her head and said, "Six weeks. At the outside. Paint the nursery first."

Did I mention that her daytime job is a nurse on the OB unit at one of the hospitals in town?

This makes me pretty happy, as it means that I'm more likely to have a newborn at my sister's wedding than still be waiting. Though, if Peanut isn't early enough, I won't be able to travel. Dang calendar having all the cool things - wedding, State Fair, Peanut - all in the same week!

Work update
My TL is supportive and helpful. Most of the people I work with on a day-to-day basis seem to think that I know what I'm doing. My customers go back and forth between being full of praise and wanting me to bring them the moon. It sounds like it should be going well, but I'm still not feeling like everything's all right.

Of course, I haven't gotten to take any time off since January, so that might have something to do with the burnout. You know, just maybe.

Brain update
Not so good. Still having panic attacks, paranoia, severe self-image problems, and in general getting back to where I was a couple weeks before I ended up in the hospital. It seems to have leveled off - it's not getting any worse - but it's also not getting better. I want to say that I'll be fine when some of the current stressors are out of my life, but I don't know that for sure.

I'm still moving, still doing things, still eating and sleeping, so that's good.

Rain update
Rain's newest trick is starting to go on a walk, getting about two houses away, and then turning around to come straight home. We think this is because it was pretty hot out for a week or so, but she thinks that she should get to do that all the time.

I can't hardly wait to let her out in the new back yard. It's probably getting fenced this upcoming Friday or Monday. We've confirmed that there are squirrels, bunnies, and birds that all hang out back there. Downwood's put down money that she's going to get carried away chasing them and run smack into the fence. I don't think she's quite that much of a dingbat, but she's surprised me before.

So what's new with you?
sabine: (Handbasket)
My weekend wore me out. There's something about driving 800 miles in 2.5 days that'll take it out of you. It didn't help that for most of it I was on highway 20 across Iowa - Road of Very Few Bathrooms.

  • Remember that scene in "Big" where Tom Hanks is jumping on the giant piano in the toy store? Peanut's been doing that to my ribs. She decided that this was a super-fun activity about halfway between Madison and Mapleton (7 hr drive). Brat.

  • Apparently, I glow. I'm not sure what exactly my family is seeing, since I think I look puffy, oily, and awkward, but they disagree. Downwood would like to point out that he STRONGLY disagrees with my self-image right now and that, to him, I am Utter Hotness. I think he's delusional.

  • It was wonderful to see my family again, even if it was for just a little while. I hadn't seen most of my dad's family since my wedding. I see my mom's family more often since they're a whole lot closer, but it was still good to spend time with them and relax a little.

  • Almost all of my reactions to stress and plans changing at the last minute are either genetic or strongly learned. Watching my mom, two of her sisters, and my grandmother all react the same way that I do was...educational. Also, we all have the same reaction to getting hungry: we get cranky. It's a little terrifying how alike we all are.

  • Did I mention that US Highway 20 is somewhat hellish when you're 7 months pregnant? There are no bathrooms. Woe. Angst.

  • 8 weeks and 5 days from today. I'm still hoping for August 1st.

  • Last night was quite possibly the best reaction to a critical botch in a game that I've ever seen. One of our intrepid band went off looking to score some of the highly dangerous drug that he got addicted to in the last session (don't blow a Toughness check in Dark Heresy - bad things happen). The dice failed him and he carried off the scene beautifully. If I had brain recording, that'd go on the highlight reel.

  • Packing continues apace. You wouldn't really know that I'd cleaned out my sewing room last week as it has now been filled up with all the baby stuff my family unloaded on me over the weekend. One aunt has an 11-month old and another's youngest child is 3. Since I like hand-me-downs, they're cleaning out their basements/spare closets. We close on the house on the 25th, will be having a painting party over the weekend of the fourth, and will probably be shifting "home base" down there the weekend of 11/12, since our home internet will be going away on the 10th. If you like hauling boxes, moving furniture, or painting walls, we will take whatever help we can get.

  • Work goes okay. Still not totally in love with my job, but not terrified/stressed out/hating it right now. I'll take what I can get.
sabine: (Bitchcakes)
Friday - Ran around like a crazy thing at work. Had excellent dinner with a lovely lady who is living proof that there are Christians who follow the teachings of Christ. Was wonderful.

Saturday - Ran around like a crazy thing at the gym, then scrubbed my car top to bottom, inside and out. Was unsurprised when it started raining later in the afternoon.

Sunday - Ran around like a crazy thing at dance practice, then started packing up books before game. While the other characters are busy killing off and hunting down brigands, my mad scientist has started converting their hideout into an evil lair. Also, trip wires and explosives FTW!

Monday - Between a hacking cough and my throat feeling like someone took a cheese grater to it, work was unpleasant. Low motivation. Managed to find a flattering pair of dress pants, then went home and passed out cold.

Tuesday - Hacking cough and throat were diagnosed as partially viral and partially due to sinus drainage. No voice to speak of, so running a game was pretty much out. Convinced Downwood to help make tasty dinners and then started reading "Bloodhound" instead of saving it for my trip like I was supposed to.

Today - Still have very low motivation for work. Not going to game tonight because I still can't talk. Also, I need to do laundry and pack - I'm heading to Chicago for a work trip this Friday afternoon and coming back next Friday night.

Three Good Things for Today
  1. Peanut is much more active now. As in, kicking and tumbling around, usually when I'm trying to fall asleep. Also, especially in my dance clothes, it's now obvious that I'm pregnant and not just chubby. Considering I'm performing at the hafla on 5/2, this is good.
  2. Winter is HBO. This has the potential to rock my socks.
  3. House hunting is going well. It looks like we'll be able to find something within our price range with the features we want - garage, fenced/fenceable yard, useable basement, kitchen that more than one person can be working in at a time, etc.
sabine: (Bitchcakes)
I managed to go all winter without wiping out on the ice or snow. I was careful with how I walked, went slow on the days that were really bad, and managed to stay upright the entire time. Today, however, my record was broken.

In my body's defense, I was really tired when I got out of bed. Yesterday was a very long day of bus rides to Chicago, back from Chicago, and walking around a GIGANTIC trade show. Still, it was surprising when my foot slipped on the top stair and I skidded my way down half the staircase.

I got out of it with a skinned elbow and a bruised backside. My back is stiff now, but I don't know how much of that is leftover from yesterday and how much is from today. Peanut seems to still be doing fine. I've been feeling somersaults the last couple days, and nothing bad seems to have happened. It was more startling than anything else, which I suppose is good.

Bleah. Now to deal with the pile of email that came in yesterday. Joy.


Mar. 23rd, 2009 01:55 pm
sabine: (Fuck)
Did you know that when you throw up for 7 hours in a row that you can burst blood vessels in your eyes? Or that you can strain your diaphragm, upper abs, and ribs so that you can't exactly walk or be jostled without pain?

I learned these things last week. Not fun.

The doctor thinks that I caught a bug, seeing as how other gamers ate the same dinner without getting ill. I am going to go with that theory, since I have no idea what happened besides Lots Of Ick.

On the bright side, Peanut's heartbeat is still strong and we get to get a look at him/her on the 31st. So that's exciting and good. Everything else is just in holding patterns for now: stress, tired, chores, stress, tired, etc.
sabine: (Mostly apples)
I'm neither dead, incarcerated, nor sick - just haven't been able to remember what I want to post about when I'm actually at the computer. Work is not so much "busy" as it is "boring". I finally got my first customer issue to troubleshoot, but I do not yet have logins to their system.

With my free time, I started working with two new (to me) sites. I joined Good Reads and put in as many books as I can remember reading. I haven't yet taken my laptop up to my library to start putting in every book I own, but if I'm ever truly bored, I might. The hyperlink there should take you to my shelf. It's a pretty cool site and is fairly easy to navigate.

I've also joined Spark People and have been tracking my meals and fitness for the last week (dreadpiratejen, if you're on that site). I think this is what I've needed to actually get on the ball and lose some of the weight that's bothering me. Yes, I know that people looking at me don't see me the way that I see myself. Yes, I know that I'm hyper-critical, but I'm honestly much, much better than I used to be. There are three things that I want - more endurance for dance, more strength for dance, and to look a little better when I dance.

Notice a trend there?

I don't want to go back to how I looked in high school. Yes, I've put on 60+ pounds since then, but I also have things like a fabulous rack, hips, and muscle that I didn't have back then. I'm not carrying all that much extra fat, but I'd like to get rid of what I have so that I can fit into the waistbands of some of my nice clothes.

To help with this, I downloaded the instructions for the Couch to 5k program. Tonight will be the end of week one, and it's very, very obvious to me that I haven't done any sort of serious running for about 2.5 years. Yikes. I would not do well in a zombie apocalypse right now. In two months, maybe.

So, that's pretty much the internal state of things. Externally, I went on a psychotic cleaning rampage two weekends ago and turned the downstairs from "post-college messy" to "actual adults live here". I threw out a TON of clutter and got everything else put where it belongs. This past weekend, we hosted a pre-Thanksgiving dinner for our friend-family group and had a blast! Also, YUM!

I may have more news later concerning the purchase of a new toy, but I don't want to say anything yet. Overall, I'm feeling much more positive and relaxed about life in general than I have in a very long time. This is an extremely good thing.
sabine: (Wizard's Staff)
8 - Hours that I'll log today, despite having pretty much nothing to do. Waiting for the moving cart thing to get here for my stuff is killing me, not that there'd really be much for me to do in my new office besides wait for class to start on Wednesday.

4 - Books that I finished over the weekend. I bought and devoured Backup and Welcome to the Jungle by Jim Butcher and Chalice by Robin McKinley. I tore through another of the So you want to be a wizard... series by Diane Duane, which is turning out to be quite a nice YA series.

2 - Last cups of pumpkin puree turned into cake yesterday. It was still warm from the oven while I was making stuffed peppers for dinner. I may have had just a couple small pieces while I was cooking. Luckily, Downwood took most of the rest of it to work with him this morning.

24 or 1 - Reasons that I'm disappointed in my Badgers. Damn last minute field goals.

3 - The number of songs that I can play drums on Rock Band before the front of my shin starts cramping. Obviously, dance class doesn't do much to strengthen that muscle specifically. My legs in general, however, are becoming more well-defined and awesome by the day.

Eleventy billion - Pieces of leftover candy consumed. Maybe I'll give up sugar for a year or two.

18 - Hours until I'll be at the voting place. I'm excited and nervous and scared that my country will decide that we don't need a smart, articulate, educated, and classy President. I'm worried that the various women's health initiatives, same-sex marriage, and other things that are trying to bring us into a more progressive, tolerant, and fair society are going to get squashed by pettiness, bigotry, and fear of change.

7 - Years old my dog is! She's now officially middle-aged for a greyhound. She's been with us for almost three years and has brought a lot of joy into our lives...except at 6:45 in the morning on a Sunday when she starts nosing my face to try to get me up to go for a walk.

4 - Reasons I should write down something that's been echoing in my head, but I can't find motivation to do so. Bleah. Hopefully, with the lessening of stress at work, the atrophied parts of my brain will get new blood flow and recover.

19 - Days until our pre-Thanksgiving dinner. If you're in Mad-town and want to RSVP, let me know. We'll supply turkey and some stuff and are asking for sides to pass. The goal is for something low-key, relaxed, and delicious.

1 - Week until I turn 29 for the first, last, and only time. To my knowledge, nothing is planned. I know the envelope on the hall table has one of my presents in it, but I'm not sure what game Downwood's playing with me. I don't know if this is a distraction and something else is getting hidden under my nose or what. Very frustrating.
sabine: (Default)
Seeing how Friday was Talk Like A Pirate Day, I garbed myself in my finest pirate regalia and headed to work to terrorize the rest of the crew of the Dread Evil Empire. Regretfully, I left all weaponry at home, as our Dread Pirate Queen doesn't approve of such measures. I finished some code, did some testing, solved a couple of things, and answered most of my email. About noon, I made my escape to head to the Northern Lights festival/workshop.

Once home, I packed the cooler and a grocery bag. I also ransacked my dance clothes and filled my half of the suitcase. Downwood packed his things, we threw the laptop into a bag, and headed out to run a couple of errands before leaving town.

While driving up to the Dells, we realized that this was the first time since our honeymoon that we were leaving town for the weekend and it was going to be just us. All of our other vacations or mini-vacations have involved either his family or mine. That makes for cheaper vacations, but there's a sense of obligation, too.

We arrived at the Kalahari resort at exactly check-in time. We breezed through the front desk and located our room. Holy crap. We had a king-size bed, a jacuzzi bathtub, a living room with comfy chairs, and a FULL kitchen with stove, microwave, fridge, AND dishwasher. It was gorgeous. I got checked in with the festival registration people and we spent the evening in Super Relaxation Mode.

When we got to the resort Friday night, I noticed that I remembered everything except my yoga mat. Thinking this would be a problem and that sleeping in sounded good, I skipped the 8 AM yoga workshop. Instead, I went straight to my morning Intro to American Tribal Style workshop. It was very different from the way that I've been taught to dance, but it was a lot of fun. I liked the improvisational style, but I think I need more than a two-hour session to decide if I want to keep learning it or not. The posture of the style made my upper back very, very sore, but I think that if I consistently practiced it, it wouldn't be so bad.

After lunch, I went to the vendors' room to do some shopping. It. was. OUTSTANDING. I only got two things, but there were so many more that I wanted to take home and snuggle and pet and love. I may not know how to dance tribal, but I adore the costuming for it. They had lots and lots of pretty things, which makes sense - I think belly dancers are actually magpies who crave and collect shinies.

I spent the afternoon in a single four-hour workshop. It was taught by Morocco. She's been a belly dancer for 48 years. Listening to her talk was...interesting. I kind of want to be her when I get old, but I don't think I want to dance her style. I learned a lot and she taught us a pretty spiffy drum solo choreography, so I think it was time well spent.

The show Saturday night was awesome. I may end up emailing the festival organizers to see if I can still buy a DVD of the performance. It was really, really impressive and inspiring. I need to practice more if I want to dance like Sonya. I very much liked watching the tribal fusion group and the Goth dancers. I don't want to dance like them, but I love watching when it's well done.

Sunday morning came very early, but since I was signed up for a Turkish workshop with Aliyah Sahar, I didn't really mind. She condensed a six-hour workshop into just over two hours. We did floorwork, learned skirt tricks, worked with zils, and got the patterns for dealing with 9/8 rhythm drilled into our heads. It was lots of bouncing around and a whole ton of fun.

When she let us go, I went out to search for Downwood. While I'd been in the workshop, he was supposed to pack the car and get us checked out, but I'd forgotten to ask him where he wanted to meet me when the workshop was over. Luckily, as soon as I stepped out of the building, I saw him walking in from the parking lot. We poured me and my wobbly legs into the car and raced home to watch the Bears.

The game was disappointing. I worked on doing laundry and not falling down because of tired legs. I made some very tasty nachos for lunch and some yummy banana bread for dinner. I also finished the book that I'd been reading and started planning out the next quilt that I'm going to make.

I watched most of the Cowboys game, but about halfway through the third quarter, the tiredness of the weekend caught up to me. I crashed on the couch, woke up enough to stagger upstairs, and passed out until late morning. Since I knew I'd want to sleep in today, I took the morning off. It let me be lazy and get up slowly and was a really good idea. After work, I'll be hitting a grocery store and probably taking it easy.

All in all, this was a really good weekend for both Downwood and me. He got to relax and spend time recharging and I got to dance in new styles. The resort was lovely, but next time we need to either get there early or stay late in order to enjoy the water park. I said on my workshop evaluation sheet that I'd be willing to attend next year and I'm already kind of excited for it.
sabine: (Must touch shiny!)
The past weekend was made of win. On Saturday, we got to watch the Badgers and then head to the book store and game store. I picked up a copy of Ink Exchange, the sequel to Wicked Lovely. It was beautiful, dark, and worth purchasing in hard cover.

We also went to Med Hookah with the Evil Empire belly dance group. The drinks and food were as good as always, even though the service was inexplicably atrocious. It ended up okay, though, since Tashar's dancing was INCREDIBLE. Tashar is widely known as "the fire dancer" and did not disappoint. Instead of using candles, she balanced a clay bowl of fire as she danced. Periodically, she would touch the bowl and have the flames on her fingers for a couple seconds. It was really, really impressive. Also, the large gentleman standing to the side with a wet towel in case of fire emergency was a nice touch.

I spent most of Sunday playing Spore. It's crack. Sometimes the controls were frustrating, but the graphics are cool and the game story is pretty darn cool. I played an herbivore into the Tribal stage and then started up an omnivore to see how that would be different. Speed is a good thing, as is flight, if you're trying to get away from predators. Just saying.

I also did a huge pile of laundry, cooked a pretty darn good lunch, almost finished my re-reading of the Belisarius series, watched the Bears game with Downwood, and started trying to learn Poi. I whacked myself a couple of times, but thanks to many years of flag line, the tennis balls didn't faze me. After working with 1.25" PVC pipe (the pole for the flag) and 2x4" (the base for a rifle), this was cake. It's really fun, but I need more time playing and maybe some instruction in order to get good enough to eventually do veil poi. Yes, I adore Sonya and would like to be her when I grow up.

Now, I'm sitting on the phone for a meeting so that I can continue working on some custom code while other apps get to make their updates. If I can make this code work, it will be really freaking cool. Also, Downwood is made of awesome for teaching me how to use Access.

back home

Aug. 9th, 2008 04:52 pm
sabine: (Gleeful evil genius)
I have:
- Laundry sorted, ready to go in the wash
- A couple new Nadas shirts, including the 2008 State Fair exclusive design.
- A code to download all their shows, including the two that will be performed tonight.
- Some new Iowa yummies, including my Very Favorite Wine Ever
- A greyhound who shows she missed us by pulling back all the covers on our bed so she could snuggle in our sheets.
- A really cool mother and sister.
- Sore feet from yesterday's trek around the Fair.
- A new appreciation for Shrimp On A Stick.
- Some sewing that I really should get right on.
- Books I want to read.
- A game I should prep for.
- A party menu to plan groceries for.
- A slightly upset tum from a not-so-good lunch on our way home.
- Not gone through my flist yet, so if something happened, drop me a comment.
- Somewhat recharged my mental batteries and feel more whole than I have in a long, long time.


Jul. 16th, 2008 11:38 am
sabine: (DDR Gir)
I changed health insurance back in May when the Evil Empire decided not to continue with the HMO that I'd had since I moved to Mad-town. I was able to keep my same primary care provider and my prescription co-pay actually went down by $10/month, so that was also a good thing.

The not-so-good thing was that my psychiatrist's clinic needed to get an authorization from the new HMO saying that I could continue care with them. I've been a patient at this clinic since October 2002, went through lots of individual and group therapy, and I have a good relationship with the doctor currently assigned my file. In short, I didn't want to change and go to a place where they don't understand my version of crazy.

When I called up the billing folks to talk to them about this, they said that in 90% of the cases, the new HMO prefers to treat patients within their network unless there's a specialist or someone specific to my old clinic. My version of crazy doesn't require a specialist. I think I'm special, but I'm pretty much run of the mill standard recurring major depressive with anxiety issues.

I asked my new HMO to let me stay at my clinic. They said they'd have to bring it to a committee and they'd let me know their decision.

I got the decision today. I can stay!



Jun. 14th, 2008 08:46 pm
sabine: (Humbug Penguin)
I have spent the last 24 hours in a daze. Remember how I said my shoulder/back was hurting? Yeah, it wasn't getting any better yesterday, so I called the doctor to ask their opinion on heat/ice/Advil dosage. They made me come in just to make sure that there wasn't anything else going wrong.

They sent me home with many pages of stretches and exercises and a bottle of muscle relaxant.

I'm at -5 INT, -3 DEX, -3 WIS, and +2 CHA - apparently, I'm cuter when I'm drugged into low coherence. I spent a good chunk of today on the couch reading cook books because they had about the highest complexity of plot that I could handle.

Everything still hurts, but I can stretch a little further than yesterday. I also am having short-term memory problems and very slow mental reaction time. At least they're not putting me as much to sleep as the doctor and pharmacist warned me.

And, obviously, the reports of my death were greatly exaggerated. I hear next year it's going to be Blog Like It's The War Of The Worlds, which would rock muchly.
sabine: (Hamlet)
  • I still do not have the plague. A list of plague-prevention items has been assembled and will be purchased tomorrow before heading to Iowa to spend the holiday with my already ill relatives.

  • I was given the You Rock! award at work today. It is a rock that has "You rock" written on it in Sharpie. It is given to the most recent Amazingly Awesome Team Member who has done wonderful things for either individuals or the group as a whole. This made me giddy. I love positive feedback!

  • All Hogswatch presents have been purchased. Most have been wrapped. Some have been delivered with varying degrees of squee.

  • The Czar and his lovely wife sent us Totally Outstanding gifts that Well played, Victaar, well played.

  • All cookie tins that are going through the USPS (with one exception) were delivered unto the hands of the helpful Guy Behind The Counter. I was first in line this morning and it was wonderfully non-stressful and efficient. Yay efficient!

  • Every muscle in my torso is tired and wants to go lie down. Silly torso. This just means I need to do many, many more undulations and practice the evil x-step.

  • The Great Light Box Experiment worked wonders for me at the end of November. My psychiatrist recommended that I try it out because we share the opinion that anything I can do to improve my mental health that doesn't involve higher doses or more kinds of meds? That's something VERY worth doing. So when the days started getting shorter, I blasted my retinas with 10k lumens every morning for a week.

    Then I gave the light box back. And promptly sank into a depressive state where I've been lingering since the 4th.

    My meds, workouts, and mood maintenance training have been keeping me going. I now have in my purse a script to get a light box of my very own and have my insurance cover most of it. Actually, I'm going to get one even if Unity says that they don't want to pay for it. Screw them, I want to feel normal again!

  • I have a five-day weekend, then a four-day weekend, then three weeks of work, then an ENTIRE week off!!!! I'm so excited! I'll get a chance to sleep, not be stressed, and work on the minis that Downwood gave me for Winterthing.

  • I have the most awesome husband who ever husbanded anything. Made of win and awesome. And our furkid is pretty adorable, too.

  • Overall, life is pretty good. I'm looking forward to January. This was a good year and I'm excited to see where things are going to go next.

  • Also, Sweeney Todd comes out tomorrow! YAY!
sabine: (Squirrel)
I live! Well, I mostly live. I'm doing my best to fight off the Plague that always seems to happen right around the holidays (go, immune system, go!) and did I mention that the holidays are starting? I have orange juice thawing under the faucet and I've been drinking Calm and Candy Cane Lane like they're going out of style. Also, yay for exercise!

Thanksgiving with the in-laws was very nice. We got to get out town for a little while, Rain got to stay overnight at Grandpa's, and it was good to see Downwood's grandparents. His whole family are very nice and don't seem to be quite so breathing-down-your-neck as some of mine. We need to spend more time down there - or have them come to us - in general. I'd really like to have that happen.

Black Friday was spent at my desk at work. I got a couple of Major Projects Nearing Set-In-Stone Looming Deadline sort of done. The really slow part, the part that takes a solid block of time to just sit there and work through the code? Yep, I got that hammered through and the Projects passed back to the original owners for edits and rework. This was good, since I got another Major Project dropped on me this morning (due very early Thursday). Here's how that conversation went:
Annoying coworker conversation. This will kill brain cells. )

This weekend was the D&D Certain Death Invitational. My players created very standard, very basic, very PHB/DMG 10th level characters of reasonably good alignment. They were told by their boss, the High Poobah of the Heroes' Guild, that they were needed to mop up a litter of baby chromatic dragons. They set forth with a chicken-livered guide and, after debating whether or not it was a good idea to ring the doorbell at the secret entrance to the dragons' lair, managed to beat down a magma drake.

I then called each player aside. I confiscated their character sheet and handed them a new one.

The baby dragons of Tiamat's Day Care - Quality Care for All Evil Wyrmlings fought valiantly against the wrongdoers of good who were trying to wipe them out. The players cheered when their original characters took damage and did a pretty good job at holding their own against the enemy. We had to call in reinforcements when the blue got KOed and the green got splatted (huge crit when she only had 3 hit points left. splat.), but Evil held their ground. A couple of the heroes got away, but they were seriously hurting when they did. I call this a stunning success!

And then we come to tonight's subject line. I was trying to come up with something to make for dinner tomorrow night that wouldn't require me to get dressed and go to the grocery store tonight (ie, anything that needs advance prep was Dead Out - chili, roast, lasagna, etc). I poked around in my freezer and found venison loin, ginger, and orange juice. Since I helpfully have garlic on hand At All Times and I found both the soy sauce and the rice wine vinegar, I'm thinking that this marinade is going to be delicious. I just have to stop on my way home tomorrow for veggies and get Downwood to start the rice and it will be a Wonderful Dinner. Yus.

But since I hear my book, my tea, and the couch calling me, I will stop with the typing and make with the recreating. I love being an adult! Maybe, just maybe, I'll throw in the DVD of Hogfather that I picked up at Borders yesterday...

news flash

Oct. 28th, 2007 09:25 am
sabine: (Cute)
The Czar and his lovely wife have been in town for the last couple of days. This totally rocks my socks. They are fabulous people through and through.

The Halloween party last night was most excellent fun. The costumes were awfully nifty and the food and drinks were very, very tasty.

There's an enormous pile of anime on the newly cleaned off dining room table. [ profile] amphion27 apparently believes that we need more fantasy in our lives. Thanks muchly! They look like they'll be a lot of fun.

Friday was Downwood's 34th birthday! His best card came from my sister (it's awesome), and his work gave him the day as a paid holiday. He's my best friend, my favorite person, the one who makes me feel safe and loved, and the absolute best thing that came out of moving to Madison 5 years ago. I love you, sweetie!
sabine: (Two Lumps Rar)
The Weekend of Awesome started Thursday night at belly dance class. Phaedra told us that she would be performing at Med Hookah on Friday night. When I got to work on Friday, I looked at my Inbox and task list and made a quick decision: instead of working later and going to the gym, I would leave right on time, hurry home, and get all my chores done early so that we might be able to go to the restaurant for the 8 pm show. I asked several people if they wanted to go with and got a couple acceptances.

Work was done. Rushing home was done. Chores were done. Dressier clothes were put on.

Phaedra is a beautiful performer. Wow. I SO need to practice more. After her set, she sat with us and chatted, since there weren't a whole lot of people in the cafe. It was so much fun. I totally recommend just getting appetizers and pomegranate martinis. Mmm...pomegranate martinis...

Saturday dawned beautiful and sunny and my alarm clock went off way too early. I rolled out of bed and took the dog for a walk, hollering at Downwood to get in the shower when I got back. I got the coffee started and had barely begun vacuuming when my parents knocked on our front door an hour ahead of when they'd told me they would show up. Crazy people left the house at 4 in the morning. Sheesh.

We chatted a little, they ran to get some donuts while I showered. We talked more and then went to the brewpub here in Verona to catch a bus to downtown. It was the first time that Downwood and my folks had ever been to Camp Randall. It was a total blast as we saw the Badgers totally demolish Northern Illinois.

I rejoiced when I saw that ISU was up over Oklahoma 7-0 and was flabbergasted when the ticker across the bottom of the scoreboard held steady at 7-0 well into the fourth quarter. I didn't find out about the end zone interception until I got home. Damn Cyclones. I love them to pieces but they've got to get rid of this habit of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

After the game, we hung out at the bar to get our free pints of the beer of the month (I love these people) and had a late lunch/early dinner/real food. Mom and Bob decided that they were going to head home, since they'd have to drive at least 30 min to get somewhere with available hotel rooms, so Downwood suggested that we go down to New Glarus and tour the shop where he works.

Machinery. Lots of dangerous looking machinery. And on a COMPLETELY UNRELATED note, I think I should increase the life insurance that I have on him. But it was a cool tour and the swords are awfully spiffy.

We came back to Madison and chilled out for the rest of the day. Played a little Puzzle Pirates, watched the Illinios-Michigan game on TV (damn penalties. grr.), and gave the dog some attention.

Sunday morning started with a bad omen: the coffeepot decided to not work again. This is distressing. But that meant we got to go out for lattes when we hit the grocery store for ingredients for cheesecake and soup. I made a totally kickass pot of soup, a loaf of bread in the bread machine, and a cinnamon struesel-apple cheesecake of yum.

The feast was fed to the Girly Pirate Crew, who were shocked and amazed to find that I actually had a "real" plot and had a storyline somewhat sketched in, including a Special Guest Appearance by Downwood as Cute Scottish Duelist With A Problem (ie, the plot). When one of the girls called at the last minute to say she couldn't make it, Val's man bravely stepped in, donned a metaphorical skirt, and sashayed with the best of them. And Deaf Artie is made of win.

Actually, that whole game is made of win. It's crack - fun, delicious, totally absurd crack. And I love it to pieces.

So, to recap, there was dancing, football, family, friends, gaming, and very good food. All in all, this weekend was exactly what I needed to be able to go to work today and not kill anyone. Yes, this is a very good thing.


Oct. 22nd, 2007 12:12 pm
sabine: (Sure)
The weekend totally rocked. Lord, how I needed this.

Details to follow as soon as I can put down a couple of the balls I'm juggling today.


sabine: (Default)

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