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Thing I did - Have finished both my business casual dresses - Queen of Hearts and Cheshire Cat.
Thing I did - Submitted a claim through Etsy to get the person to whom I paid money for Cheshire ears and tail. I've not heard a single word from him/her since I paid. I am resigned to not having these in time for the con.
Thing I need to do - Either find a heart purse on Amazon or go to the store and get some wooden pieces to put together to make a heart scepter. Also, E600 my teacup fascinator to a headband and it's done.
Thing I need to go - Get my Glow Cloud costume bits consolidated. Raid Emi's stuffed animal collection.

Thing I did - Got Mother's Day gifts for both my mom and Downwood's mom.
Thing I need to do - Finish decorating my last linen panel, then sew up the gift bags. I couldn't find any canvas in my stash, but I found some natural colored linen. I have Sharpies. I have mad Zentangle skills. I think you can see where this is going.

Thing I did - Worked from 1:45-3 on Saturday. AM, not PM. Felt pretty miserable all day Saturday as a result.
Thing I did - Got my hair cut Saturday morning. Just a trim to freshen up my layers. My next one's in June and I'll probably have her hack off a bunch of the length then, since it might be summer. Maybe.
Thing I did - Got a new tattoo on Saturday. It's a lotus and it's intensely lovely. It's on my left shoulder and I've decided it's the start of my sleeve. I'd been thinking about sleeving my right arm, but my peacock is so glorious that anything else seems unnecessary. But I can do a bouquet of flowers down my left arm. Yus.

Thing I did - Hemmed a pair of capri leggings for me.
Thing I need to do - The rest of the hemming from that batch of sewing. But first I broke my needle, then when I got out a new one, my bobbin decided to be terrible. So I rage!quit and haven't gone back to it. I also need to go buy more ballpoint needles.

Thing I did - Made my aerobic exercise goal for the week, according to Fitbit. I've found that I can use our stationary bike and do my Spanish Duolingo homework at the same time. Two birds, one stone.
Thing I need to do - Keep it up. Keep pushing myself to do better.

Thing I did - Got permission from work to start taking Comp Sci classes.
Thing I did - Applied to UW to be a "Special Student"
Thing I need to do - Continue waiting patiently for them to process my application. Then, assuming they accept me, get registered, pay tuition, buy books, all the college things.

Thing I did - Figured out the rules for "No Thank You, Evil". Got Downwood, Emi, and Alex through char gen. Ran a small adventure for Downwood and Emi (Alex wandered off).
Thing I did - Explained to Emi what "meta-gaming" and "power gaming" are and why she can't just add new gadgets to do things for her whenever she runs into a snag. Downwood was an excellent role/roll model for her. Surprisingly fun for all of us.
Thing I need to do - Come up with an idea for the next adventure
Thing I need to do - Find a date/time for our grown-up gaming group to meet

Thing I did - Backed out of going to my half-sister's graduation party. I'm going to be in Miami 5/14-5/18 and St Louis 5/23-5/26. My sanity won't allow me to try to shoehorn a trip to Iowa and Kansas in there from 5/20 to 5/23. Not going to happen.
Thing I need to do - Buy a gift card. Mail it.

Thing I did - Found fabric in my stash for new dresses
Thing I need to do - Adjust the sleeves on the wrap pattern to be a bit more snug. Or just put a contrasting cuff on it. Or fix it. See if I can convert a short sleeve to a flutter sleeve for my Moneta pattern. I think I know what to do, just not sure how it will look.
Thing I need to do - Cut them out once I update my patterns.


Apr. 12th, 2016 10:13 am
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Teacher M is down with my plan to start a Comp Sci certification program this summer. Anything to make me more stable and happier in my job is a good thing, especially since I don't plan on quitting. My health insurance is amazing, yo, and I need it.

Back in January (I think), I was working on a wearable muslin of a pea coat pattern. I kept thinking that it'd be okay, but turned out to completely not fit. So I took it to class last night and had ReplyHazy try it on. It fit and I told her it was hers. She has to sew on the buttons and cut the button holes, but everything's there. I am sort of sad because it's totally awesome, but I don't have the energy to take it apart to make it fit better. I know more for next time, that's for sure. And RH is super cute in it. And she can appreciate the total nerdery of the somber exterior and kind of silly lining.*

I did a bunch of yoga over the weekend. It felt nice, so I'd like to keep doing this. I didn't have the energy this morning, though. Tuesdays are hard. Maybe after work. Or something. I just need to get more active again. I'll feel better.

Werk's Spring Conference of Minor Doom is this week and next. Our culinary options are limited, since we're feeding all the extra people instead of the usual employees.** I bought bananas and granola bars to have at my desk to help with the limited menus. They're still sitting at home on the kitchen table. I has a sad.

Dungeon Roll is the current game of choice for Downwood and me. It's us against the dice instead of us against each other, so it doesn't end with hurt feelings (he crushes me in pretty much every game we play ever). It doesn't take forever to set up.*** Also, Emi and Alex can roll some of the dice to help, but they don't yet understand that they can't then manipulate the dice until Momma or Daddy has decided what to do about the current layout.

I cracked 125k words on the writing project I'm sharing with Downwood. The plot thickens and the characters are about to have a series of very bad days. Mwahahahaha.****

I caved and bought all three new flavors of peanut M&Ms. None of them suck. I was surprised. The Honey Nut are standard peanut M&Ms, just a bit sweeter than normal. The Coffee Nut ones have a nice coffee bitterness to them. The Chili Nut ones have a surprising amount of heat on the back end. Downwood claims that the red Chili Nut M&Ms have more heat than the other colors in the pack. Clearly, I need to eat more M&Ms. FOR SCIENCE.

I've been wearing tinted lip balms for the last couple months and I love it. My current favorite is Neturogena MoistureSmooth color stick in Rich Raisin. I feel pretty.

My officemate has been in the office the last two weeks. She's been on the phone and loud pretty much constantly. She was going to be out this week and I was excited. Then she cancelled her trip because of things on fire and full of bees. I am disappointed.

I'm wearing my new dress from this pattern. I'm wearing a tank top under so that the v-neck is more work-appropriate. It's comfortable and cute, which is nice.

*Star Wars. It's mostly lined in flannel with a lovely navy contrast print on lapels and cuffs. Totes adorbs.

**Not bitter, truly, just annoyed that my usual routines are disrupted. They're moving my cheese and I do not approve.

***I'm looking at you, Pathfinder card game. You're fun, but SERIOUSLY.

****A lot of guys ignore the laugh, and it's about standards. I mean, if you're gonna get into the Evil League of Evil, you have to have a memorable laugh. What, do you think Bad Horse didn't work on his whinny? His terrible death-whinny?
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It's snowing. Has been for a while now. Gorgeous fluffy flakes. It looks very slippery. I'm not enthusiastic about going to dance and driving home very late through this.

The weekend was good. We had friends over for board games on Saturday. Pandemic killed us quickly. The Shadow Over Westminster killed everyone but the Templar, who turned out to be working for the Darkness all along. Templars!

Sunday was for laundry, taking down the Christmas decorations, cleaning, and trying to not freak out about the upcoming week. My dad sent us a gorgeous beef tenderloin that Downwood cooked to PERFECTION. It was amazing and wonderful and all things good.

Alex spent the weekend showing off his new words. He has lots. This is an amazing thing. We always knew that he had a lot to say and now he's able to share some of what's going through his head.

Emi spent the weekend being demanding and difficult. She gets bored easily and isn't good at it. She'd rather have us entertain her than try to entertain herself. This is unpleasant for everyone.

Downwood and I spent the weekend doing chores and writing in a game we've played off and on over the years. We're at 9.1k words, which is nothing to sneeze at.

I feel like I never get enough done on the weekends. I have TWO WHOLE DAYS to be productive and I just don't manage it most of the time. And then I start imagining catastrophes and feeling bad about how I expect the upcoming week to go. And it just doesn't feel good. I'm doing better at spending time with the uncomfortable feelings, labeling whether I'm thinking or feeling and whether it's pleasant or unpleasant. It's a trick from Headspace and it's helping.

And it's snowing harder. 1.5 hours until I make the call on what I think the roads will be like after 9. Ick.


Jan. 4th, 2016 10:56 am
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While at home this weekend (more on that later), my stepdad told me that having a resolution to "be a better human" wasn't a good one. He wanted me to come up with something quantifiable so that I can prove progress.

Have I mentioned that he's been in education his whole career? A teacher and then an administrator?

So here are my goals for the year and how I will measure success.
  • Wear lipstick more often. If I wear lipstick once a week or once every two weeks, that will be more often than the once every 3 months (average) of last year. I have to decide if this means I'll wear other makeup, too. We'll see.
  • Get to 65% fluent in Spanish on Duolingo. I'm at 49% right now, so this seems like a reasonable goal. If I make this goal early (say, by June or something), I'll extend it to be a higher amount.
  • Get to a streak of 100 days on Headspace. I'm at 48 now, so I could conceivably get this mark 4 times. I didn't want to say 365, since if I mess up once, I'll have failed. I also didn't want to say that I'll work on being more grounded and in the moment. Headspace is helping with that and if I keep working on it, I'll keep getting this streak.
  • Meet my Goodreads book challenge of 175. This is doable. Re-reading counts. Audiobooks count. Books read to kids count.
  • Game at least once as a player. Pretty self explanatory. I like running games, but I miss playing in them.

Here are some smaller goals for the year:
  • Have fun with my sister at the PostSecret concert in Milwaukee in February. Reach out to Milwaukee natives to find good places to go eat and/or visit during the day.
  • Have fun at the Costume Convention. Don't beat myself up for not being as awesome as I'm anticipating all the other people there being. Relax. If I can make a costume, cool. If not, I can shop in my closet. I have Carmen Sandiego, Poison Ivy, Rainbow Brite (a blond wig would really help sell the look), the Glow Cloud (ALL HAIL), Lucy (need my own wig, though. or lots and lots of hair spray), and any number of historical bits and pieces. I know what I WANT to do, but I need so many foundation garments (proper corset, petticoats, bustle, etc) that I don't think it'll happen.
  • Find a heritage train in either MN or IL for us to ride this summer. We've gone on train rides in WI and IA already and I have this idea that it could be cool to try to hit a train every summer in a different state.
  • Start planning my 2017 sabbatical. Current thought is to take my parents, kids, Downwood, and MiL to a resort in Central America. Something where there are activities for kids, allergy friendly dining, Wi-Fi, and a beach.
  • Continue wearing clothes that fit me as I am today.
  • Continue Kon-Mari-ing my stuff. I've gotten rid of a whole bunch of things and have many, many more to go.
  • Sew from my stash and not buying new fabric. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
  • Read from my To Be Read pile and not buy new books. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
  • Try to use the library instead of just buying all the Kindle books if I don't know the author/series, but don't beat myself up if I don't change this habit right away.
  • Continue Zentangling, drawing, coloring, and paper journaling. These are good things. They relax me and make me happy, so I should do them. Don't beat myself up if I don't do it every day, though.
  • Dance. Breathe. Be present. Be creative. Be smart.
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The weekend was good, I think. I still have a pretty bad cough at night, so sleep was an issue. Saturday was mostly taken up by applying henna to my hair and sewing. I finally finished all of Emi's xmas present - various princess dresses, including Wonder Woman and Batman because that's how I roll - and was able to start on some selfish sewing - leggings and a modded-Moneta-to-Darth-Vader dress.

Sunday morning I got up and did some sewing. Then I cleaned up the kitchen and did a bunch of laundry. Then people came over for gaming and pizza. I ran my Scion game for the first time in months. It went okay, I guess. Downwood was happy with it for the first time in a long time and he's reassured me several times over that the other players also enjoyed it.


I finally got to sew up a pair of incredibly soft leggings and a pair of leggings in a Marvel superhero print that is AWESOME. I have trendy legs! These are super comfortable, to the point where I may never wear actual pants again.

I am wearing actual pants, though. I have a couple pairs of jeans that almost fit - need a belt to keep them up. I have a couple of pairs of palazzo pants, too, which are basically comfy pajama bottoms that look like dress pants.

I find myself looking at tunics and palazzos on my shopping sites, not so much at the dresses and skirts that I'd been living in for the year previous. I'm not sure if this means that I'm paying attention to trends, finally, or if it means that I just like pants when they actually fit correctly. Probably a little of both. Hard to say.
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Life is eating me. I'm working hard on my LARP of a Responsible Adult. I'm tired of adulting, but I need to just keep moving. It doesn't help that now I'm in an office with a window. Gray, rainy days sap my motivation to keep moving and doing things. When I was in an interior office, I never saw outside, so the weather had no affect on me. Also, SAD is starting to kick in. No me gusta.

The kids are SO ready for Halloween. Super excited. I'm not stressed about it, just a little anxious. We went to the annual Halloween Party last weekend. I made a royal blue dress (Moneta bodice and two layers of circle skirt) and got new rainbow socks, arm warmers, and belt. I didn't get a wig, but I still made a pretty adorable Rainbow Brite.

I'm on the final day of a week of not fun antibiotics. A couple weeks ago, I picked at a hangnail and it got infected. Last week I realized it wasn't getting better on its own and my finger was literally twice the size of the same finger on the other hand. I went to the dr and got a course of antibiotics. It's helping, but annoying. My finger is still kind of sore and swollen - zils were NO FUN on Monday - and the antibiotics are a "take 4x a day on empty stomach". Very annoying.

I started playing Guild Wars 2 again. The expansion came out and the Halloween event started. I love the Halloween event, so I started it back up. I only need to carve 30 more pumpkins and I'll have the entire meta-achievement done. This will mean nothing to non-GW2 players, but it's a badge of honor, skill, time, or something like that. They also came out with a new character class, so Downwood and I created twin characters. Our names are Castor and Leda, because that's how we roll.

I have too many good books piling up. I finally read "Ancillary Mercy" and it was WONDERFUL. I cared more about the AI in this book than I will ever make anyone care about a "real" character in something I come up with. WONDERFUL, I say. I have "Radiance" and the WtNV novel on my desk and I CAN'T DECIDE. As soon as I read one, I'm not reading the other. WOE IS ME.

I interviewed a new tattoo artist at the shop by asking for a small piece. Mostly, I wanted to be sure that we could get along (he loves books, so YEAH) and that his ideas about color are in line with mine. I love my new little pumpkin and am excited for my birthday tattoo - a memorial cardinal for Grandpa Tom.

My birthday tattoo will be on Nov 7. This is the same day as Newer Dancer Night. Emi thinks I should dance to "something classical". I don't know if I'm going to be able to get something good by then....and if I'll want to dance after a couple hours of tattooing. I kind of want to just put on something nice and sit back with friends and a drink.

And now it's time to work. The things I kicked off are all done. I need tea and to warm up some breakfast so that I can take my penultimate antibiotic before lunch and the last one in the afternoon. I will say one thing for this regiment: it's REALLY cut down on my snacking habits!


Sep. 10th, 2015 08:47 pm
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So there's this game I enjoy. It's called Plague, Inc. You play as a pathogen of some kind - virus, fungus, bacterium, etc - and try to destroy humanity. My strategy tends to be pretty simple: get as infectious as I can, infect nearly all the world, then become as lethal as I can in a hurry. As with any game, this works better for some disease types than for others.

One disease type is a completely fictional "Neurax Worm". It's a parasitic worm that lives in the human brain and can control thought. With this puppy, I can completely enslave humanity in about a year and a half (game time).

The game comes with several Official Scenarios. Things like "Can you make the black death kill everyone this time?" or "Can you still kill everyone if countries are paranoid and the land borders start out closed?". You can also play in free mode at varying levels of difficulty. 

Why bring this up? 

One of the Official Scenarios is to play an ancient virus recently thawed from the Siberian permafrost. A giant virus used to cold conditions, you have to repair the DNA and evolve it to be infectious to modern humans.

Guess what happened this week? Scientists found a giant virus in the Siberian permafrost and are planning on resurrecting it to study.

Just for giggles, I pulled up that scenario last night and played through it. Yep, I can destroy humanity with this virus. That's...not entirely reassuring.
sabine: (Default)
 DreamWidth didn't want to let me type an entry until I left Chrome and started logging in through FireFox. Then, suddenly, everything worked. The magic of computers, I tell you.

Ox is in bed. He's discovered the magic of words in books. He's also discovered the magic of figuring out which word on the page is the silliest and have me read that word over and over and over. Potty training is not going so well, but he's SO PROUD when he gets to wear undies. He'll vogue and strike a pose when his undies have cartoons on.

Emi and Downwood are playing SWTOR together. Downwood is tanking for Emi. She ABSOLUTELY FLAT OUT REFUSED to EVEN CONSIDER playing a Sith. Jedi all the way. This process is completely adorable. The game is free to play, so she has her own account and everything. And she's not doing a bad job of it, by all accounts. 

Me? I was at my desk for more than 11 hours today. Tomorrow's going to be just as long, if not more. I had some time to do the things that I liked, but most of it was grunt work and no fun.

So, yeah. I'm tired, my neck and back are spiking pain, and I really want to go to bed.

But there's ice cream in the freezer, I have both a new Hidden Almanac and Sleep With Me for tonight. I also got the audiobook for "The Goblin Emperor" and it's charming, though I foresee problems remembering the names when I can't see them spelled out. I'm almost done with "City of Stairs", which is disturbing and lovely. I need to download episode 1 of the new season of "Indexing". Things are not totally terrible. Werk just sucks. 
sabine: (Default)
Friday - I took the morning as a half sick day. I got some stuff done from home, but was mostly so I could sleep in and then keep an eye on Emi and Ox while Downwood went to the dentist. Friday afternoon was BusyBusyBusy, mostly with back to back meetings and trying to get through some of the things that fell by the wayside while I was traveling. Got home late and was very tired.

Saturday - Got to sleep in a bit (7! Woo!), then worked on getting things picked up a bit. We had to clear the kitchen table of random junk, put the leaf in, and get things swept. Then, I spent some time trying to come up with a bit of an adventure for my Scion players. I was despairing and bemoaning my tragic lack of creativity and feeling like a hack and finally resorted to flipping through old pages to see if anything was there. I found something, did a little research, and decided it was a genius idea and all would be well.

We ordered pizza and we spent some time recapping. When it came time for me to monologue a bit to set the scene and all, I went to get a prop. You see, way back on Halloween, we had a drunken conversation discussing how Carmen Sandiego (my costume) and Waldo (Downwood's costume) would play in a Scion game. I decided it was time to pull that in.

So the players found a mysterious red-hatted woman in their hideout. Only one PC had the cultural background to get the reference and the player had him go Complete Fanboy. It was charming and adorable. Though they probably shouldn't have gone along with it, there was a heist and there was a distraction that probably left everything pinned on them, along with some dead bodies. The PCs don't know what she was there to steal and they don't know why she chose them. I'm not sure why they trusted (sort of) an unknown Demigod Scion (of Loki), but there you have it. This may come back to bite them.

Also, near the end of the session, I finally found a bad guy that could actually damage the heroes before being obliterated. There was a thrown motorcycle that got flung back at the thrower and other violent actions. The PCs limped away and got to the starting point for their next jaunt.

After game, after people left, I was in a deep fog. Just totally out of spoons and People Points. I snuggled the kids, read them books, and drew pictures with Emi. Not much brain, no attention span, and didn't really want to interact on an adult level.

Sunday - As usual, all the laundry. I was still in a fog for most of the day, but surfaced a couple of times. We watched the new episode of Mythbusters as a family (with popcorn!). I completely emptied my To Be Hemmed pile (I KNOW, RIGHT?!?!). Both kids got in trouble a couple times and kicked off of screen time despite protests.

I tried to play GW2 a couple times, but can't open the game. I get an anxiety panic attack at the load screen. It doesn't make a lot of logical sense, but there it is. It's mostly a feeling of pressure - that if I don't do certain things, or in a certain way, or something else, that I'm doing it wrong. That I need to do it right. That it's not a fun thing, but a thing that I need to have goals and I need to do the right things and only the right things to get  to the right goal.

I read some, but mostly just did laundry, refereed kids, and existed in a bit of a fog.

Today - I have no idea. I've been easily distracted today, but have gotten some things done. I just still feel in a fog. Bleah. Kind of sad to not have dance tonight. I should find some replacement exercise - maybe I'd feel better.

Tomorrow is going to be no fun. I have a therapy app't in the middle of the day and that doesn't make the rest of the afternoon go well. Drat it all. Sigh.


Jun. 22nd, 2015 08:50 am
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Some good things happened over the weekend.
  • I made a pair of shorts from the P4P Straight Palazzo pattern out of some el cheapo GC sale fabric. I cut them to the shorts length mostly because I wanted to see how they'd fit through the tummy and booty before committing to anything bigger. They're okay. I need more rise in the back and maybe a little more rise in the front. They're also pretty darn short, especially on my long legs. They're comfy and good for at home and sleeping, if nothing else.
  • I nearly finished two P4P Deep Sea V-neck shirts for Emi. On one of them, the neckband got a little wonky, but not bad enough for me to rip it out and start over. I need to hem the bottoms and topstitch the neckband and then they're done!
  • I went over to Nearby Town and submitted the paperwork and $$ to get my passport renewed. It really, really expired so I had to basically apply for a brand new one. Emi asked if she could come with me, so she was playing a tangram game on my phone while we waited and waited for our turn.
  • After the passport outing, Emi and I stopped at the local cafe. I had a fancy coffee. She had a limeade. We sat and enjoyed the place, though Emi kept asking if there was ANYTHING on the menu that was safe for her to have. Poor kiddo. Maybe someday.
  • Saturday afternoon and evening, we had friends over. It was galieth's birthday, so we played games. Castle Ravenloft kicked our butts as usual. Snake Oil was waaaaaaay too much fun. The Kill Dr Lucky card game (Get Lucky) was fun, but we miss the mechanics of the board game. The card game is much more cut-throat. We ordered in pizza and then watched The Lego Movie. I didn't get to see most of the movie because of putting kids in bed and then back in bed and then back in bed again, but it was nice.
  • Ox was very sad while we were playing games, since he really wanted to play, too. Emi got to play Ravenloft with us, but got kicked out during Snake Oil, since her reading skills aren't quite up to the necessary level of that game. Also, our senses of humor are grown-up and some of the products we came up with aren't appropriate for small ears.
  • We did some dungeon runs in GW2 Sunday afternoon. One really hard one and then an easy one. It was a little stressful during the hard one, but we managed.

Last night at bedtime, I told Emi that I have a work trip this week and that I'd be home on Thursday. This is after she saw me packing my suitcase, mind you, but at that time she'd been more concerned with whether she could convince me to either play more games at the table or let her "fly" on my feet. She totally broke down sobbing, but agreed that it would be okay if she could Skype with me daily and if I bring her back a package of bubble gum.

Neither kid woke up when I came in this morning to give them big hugs. Emi stirred a little to remind me to bring home some gum. Ox was passed out cold.

Now it's raining and I'm trying to get all the things done so that when I leave with my car pool at 1:30, nothing explodes. I'm sad, of course, and will miss my kiddos. I'm also going to miss dance class. And all the other things that go into my daily life at home. I'm still tired and worn down, but I don't see this changing ever.


May. 22nd, 2015 07:01 pm
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Hatoful Boyfriend is on sale for $2.50. Anyone dare me to buy it? :) 
sabine: (Default)
There were many good things on the weekend. And several exhausting things.

Friday - Left work a little early, but since I got there silly early, it wasn't actually a big deal. Came home, had dinner, had snuggles, went to bed.

Saturday - Woke up bright and early with cold Ox feet pressed to my spine. Like all kids, he's more happy to be up really early on the days that he could just sleep in. I got up and Emi came out, too. She could also sleep in, but decided that she should be up EVEN EARLIER than on a school day. Suggestions to just go back to sleep were met with a meltdown. This will become a theme.

Prepped for Scion game. Found out that one player wouldn't be able to come (in-laws visiting). Then found out that two other players were on call and getting dragged into work things and might not make it at all. Emi melted down and then refused to nap. This is doing her head cold NO FAVORS.

Eventually people came over and we gamed. Once again, I pull out bad guys that look scary on paper, but turn out to be not even a challenge. At all. The players steamroll over everything in their path.

I'm...frustrated. They seem to be having fun, which is okay, but then Downwood wears his grumpy face all day because the combat's over before he gets a turn and it's just...yeah.

Kids ended up going to bed late, since gaming pushed dinner until late. This wouldn't be a problem except

Sunday - Once again, both kids awake at the crack of dawn. Ox, because he's a morning person. Emi, because she's contrary. Once again, refusing to rest and nap and anything that would help her immune system fight off the cold. Sigh.

I started laundry going and took a couple of steps on a sewing project. Then showered and noticed the freezing rain coming down. Went out in it anyway to go get coffee with RH and Au. Aside from the sidewalk outside the coffee shop being a SOLID SHEET OF ICE, it was a lovely time. Wonderful coffee, tasty scone, good friends, and relaxing conversation. I either saw Mary Robinette Kowal or her doppleganger. I didn't go eavesdrop on their conversation to confirm either way, though I did explore her Facebook and website to see if she had any announced plans to come to Madison. I'm a fangirl, but not quite rabid enough to interrupt a conversation when I wasn't positive. Still, cool.

Stopped by Walgreens for med refills, went home, had tacos for lunch (mmm...tacos...), and did more laundry. I also finished another of my KnitFix projects - a Julia cardigan for my MiL as a birthday present. I made some progress on other KnitFix projects (shirts for Ox), mediated disputes, cajoled kids into picking up their rooms, snuggled Ox, and tried to not be overwhelmed by all of the everything.

Downwood cleaned the kitchen, I got the kids' rooms less booby-trapped (legos on the floor in the middle of the night = hell), and it was the typical "Get all the household things done that I don't have time for during the week" Sunday.

Today - Emi coughed all night long. I didn't get good sleep, but still had to get up really early for work. If I don't get in by 7, I can pretty much kiss my productivity goodbye, especially when I start with meetings at 8.

Emi was up before I got in the shower. Even though she's sick. Even though it's spring break and she has 9 days off of school. Even though she didn't have to get up at all, she was up a half hour before normally I'd be dragging her out of bed by her toenails. She REFUSED to go back to sleep. Ox was up shortly after. Downwood was up shortly after that.

I'm tired, grumpy, and bitter. I get whining at home and come into work to more whining. I've had a lot of coffee, but not much in the way of healthy, good food (which is, honestly, a contributing factor to my mood).

Looking forward to this week:
Tonight - Dance.
Wednesday (probably) - new WtNV podcast
Friday (maybe) - Girl Scouts for Emi
Saturday & Sunday - Easter with MiL

Next week: 
Monday - Dance
Friday - Final ink on peacock
Saturday - BUW workshop and show. I may or may not do the workshop. Tripp Commons is EVIL on my back and knees, but the show is at Monona Terrace and will have a bar

Then the next Monday I have off work and a spa appointment. Somewhere in here I have a haircut, but it's not in my phone so I have no idea. Need to call and check. I'm thinking going shorter for spring, but I don't know what will look nice on me with a minimal amount of effort on my part.

sabine: (Default)
I can completely enslave humanity in 412 days. Plague Inc is my new favorite phone game. It's a really good phone adaptation of one of my favorite computer games. The concept is that you control an organism - bacteria, virus, parasitic worm, etc - and try to destroy humanity. You can modify your DNA to change infection vectors, gain antibiotic resistance, and symptoms. While it's incredibly satisfying to see my tiny bacterium kill the entire world, I'm more a fan of the Neurax Worm vector, since with the right set of symptoms, you can enslave humanity. Very satisfying.

The voice memo function on my phone is good for when I'm in bed, very tired, and need to get some lists out of my head so that I can fall asleep. Listening to them in the morning is weird, though.

I'm not yet developing agoraphobia because of one major detail in my life. If agoraphobia develops when you start avoiding the places that make you anxious, I'm building an immunity every day that I walk into work expecting bad things. My breathing gets weird, my chest tightens up, and I start freaking out. I have to get to my desk so I can have breakfast, so I have to get through the rising panic.

I have a peppermint mocha this morning. It's the only thing keeping me from jumping down the throats of people who want to make everything my fault/responsibility to fix.

Buying presents doesn't freak me out. I like buying things or making things for people. Wrapping presents this year is causing me stress. Not cool, subconscious. Not cool.

I'm getting to hand off one of my most troublesome customers. One of the two that I cringe whenever I see their email or reception says are on my line. The hand off won't be complete until February, but I'll get to start handing off part of my workload starting in the next week. This is amazing and wonderful and not to be trifled with.

Community/Family Calendar
  • Saturday - Pictures of the kiddos followed by playing in the mall. I may brave the bra store to get a fitting and a bra that fits. I need a new one and it's worth spending money on.
  • Sunday - Maybe friends over for gaming? Maybe not? Definitely on call for a work thing that, should things be going haywire, I won't be able to fix. Good times.
  • Monday - Dance
  • Wednesday - Hair cut. Finally. My bangs are out of control.
  • Saturday - Manicure
  • Sunday - Gaming? Maybe?
  • Monday - Dance
  • Friday - Leave work early, go to Iowa
  • Saturday-Sunday - Family togetherness
  • Monday - Work. Dance?
  • Tuesday- No work. Massage and date night.
  • Then Christmas
  • Then the first round of color on my peacock
  • Then New Years
  • Then back to work on 1/2/15


Jul. 14th, 2014 09:16 am
sabine: (Default)
Friday - Left work right on time and came home. I'd thought about leaving a little early to go to JoAnn's for a new double needle, but decided to just come home.

I came home and pulled the kids outside to play with the neighbors. I talked with the neighbor mom and the kids drew chalk all over the driveway. Downwood was in a terrible mood, so I figured it was best to get us all out of his hair.

The results of my henna experiment are conclusive - the spray gel works REALLY WELL as a henna extender if applied when the henna is more dry than not. It re-moistens it, which lets it stain more. It also holds it on the skin longer - it's actually kind of difficult to chip off. This also lets the stain be longer. I like it and I'm going to continue using it.

Saturday - Tried and failed to sleep in. Both kids came in for snuggles and stealing of Mom's phone. Got up, dinked around online, then went and got my hair cut. I love my stylist. She is amazing and wonderful.

Came home and refreshed my knowledge of the Scion campaign I'm running. I decided that it was time that we should put the Rock back in Ragnarok. So far, it's going reasonably well. The players were understandably distraught when they saw that the cover of the book really is Ragnarok, but they recovered nicely. We had to do some serious recap to remember where we'd left off the last time we played (May), but we had pizza, friends, and dice. So that was all lovely and good.

In the evening, Emi and I worked downstairs. I rethreaded my serger and pulled one of my Project Bins out of the cabinet. This one had "Things to sew when you finally switch the serger to white thread". I hemmed a pile of handkerchiefs (squares of linen and cotton, found in my Great Stash Organizing), mended a rip in one of Downwood's pajama pants, and zipped together new dresses for the girls. Emi helped by clipping the threads from the handkerchiefs and putting them in the washer.

Also laundry, because Emi wanted her favorite clothes clean.

Sunday - Slept in a little bit. Got tackled by Ox, who wanted snuggles, a dry diaper, and my phone. Not really sure if the order of those things mattered to him.

After Emi woke up, we had some breakfast and then got her bags packed. She helped pick out her clothes for her suitcase, the books for her backpack, and the bedtime stuffies/blankies for her bedtime bin. Then Downwood got the car ready and he and Emi took off for Illinois.

Ox was distraught. He went and put his shoes on and went back to the garage. So I put him in the car and we went to JoAnn's for fabric and needles. Then we went to the FLGS for dice and the new D&D Starter Set. Then to McD's for french fries.

After we got home, I did more laundry and played some GW2. Then the rest of the day was for doing dishes, finishing laundry, watching cartoons, reading rules, washing dishes, and entertaining little dude. We got to Skype with Emi, Daddy, and Grandma, after which Ox had another meltdown when he realized it was just pictures on the computer. So we had to call back to have them reassure him everything would be fine.

I made dinner for us. As we finished eating, Downwood came home. When he came inside, Ox had a FULL BODY MELTDOWN when he realized Emi wasn't with him. Ox went to get his shoes and tried to pull me to to door with the expression of "Mom. Dad forgot Emi. We need to go rescue her". Little dude wasn't being reassured AT ALL that Emi was fine, was with Grandma, and we were here, and everything's okay.

As a distraction, I went downstairs and grabbed the Lego kit I'd picked up for his birthday present. Downwood sat with him and helped him build the construction machine. Ox calmed down eventually. While the boys worked on the lego, I went down and sewed together some of the fabric Ox and I picked up. Ox now has a Thomas pillow on his bed. Emi has a Spiderman pillow with glow in the dark webs.

Then it was time for bath and bed for little dude.

We called Grandma to see if Emi was settling in okay. Emi. Was. FINE. In fact, she was so fine that she was bouncing and shrieking "BUBBLES! BUBBLES! BUBBLES!" when we asked what they'd done. Apparently, bubbles were involved. And riding her tricycle. And reading books. And having dinner. And everything else.

I have two VERY different kids. It is becoming more and more apparent. :) This is kind of cool.

Today - I woke up on the wrong side of the bed or something. I'm very tired and grumpy and the jerkbrain is loud. I miss my Emi. Ox was still totally snoozy this morning when I left. I went in and told him good morning anyway, since I do that for Emi when she's still sleeping when I leave.

I'm angry at myself for not being more productive with my time. I'm saying bad things to myself for not knowing when we're going to get to Faire this year. I'm calling myself names because of money management issues. I put on clothes and think things are okay and then I look in the mirror and can only think cruel things.

But I made it to work. I have tea. I have a coworker who commiserated with me on the fate of a character in a story we both love. I have Jane Austen on my Kindle. I finished my audiobook ("How the White Trash Zombie Got Her Groove Back" - 4 stars), so I can download a new one.

I have henna and nail polish remover. I finished my Mensa daily puzzle easily. I will get tasty lunch. I can maybe try to leave right on time and swing through JoAnn's for fabric Downwood requested (he's jealous of the kiddos' new pillows). There's dance tonight. I can make a post with all my sewing projects and ideas. I have a new episode of KUEC for tonight.

It's going to be okay.

sabine: (Default)
I have chicken curry for lunch. It is delightful, though sadly lacking in vegetable. I also have sourdough bread because I decided I needed something to sop up the extra curry sauce. Om nom nom!

UPS says my initial Girl Charlee order will arrive today! I'll get home late from work, so I won't have enough time to cut, but I *will* have enough time to throw the fabric in the washer. This'll get me enough fabric for two or three pencil skirts, one A-line skirt, and a Moneta (once I figure out what bodice size I need). I'm delighted at the imminent expansion of my peacock wardrobe.

Friday we have no plans.
Saturday is haircut (FINALLY!) and Scion - I need to read up on what comes next in the story arc...and remember where we left off, since we didn't play at all in June.
Sunday is Downwood taking Emi down to his mom's for the week. I'll be home, hanging out with Ox while they're driving down and back. Sniff. Baby girl is SO BIG.

Next week is more work craziness. Then Emi comes home and my folks come up and it's the Giant Werk Picnick of DOOOOOOOOOOM!.

Then I go to Miami for a week. Yey. To my least favorite customer. Yey. To work 12 hr days. Yey.

Then there's a week and it's SitG. I'm doing henna! I have a booth! I need to make up signs/pages of examples of $5/$10/$15/$20 designs so that people don't flip out. Also, I need to purchase show tickets. I told AJ that I don't have a performance piece ready enough to be happy with myself. I have standards about how many hours it would take to effectively polish something for that venue and I don't have the spare spoons/sticks for that right now.

Instead, I have curry. Mmmm....curry...


Jun. 23rd, 2014 11:07 am
sabine: (Default)
Friday - OMG!Busy at work. When I put things off, I pay for it. Blah. But I got a lot done, which is really the main thing, right?

Saturday - Yet another rainy day at home. Downwood moved the couches in the TV room so we could excavate the accumulated snacks and socks. I piled up all the blankets and pillows and washed everything. We vacuumed everything and the room seemed better. Emi and I built towers from blocks and Ox knocked them down. I played with my twin needle by hemming skirts for Emi and her bestie. Lazy and quiet.

Sunday - Woke up slow, then worked on cleaning the kitchen table. Au and her boy came over for lunch, coffee, and playing. The kids ran around like small, maniacal monkeys and we tried to remember how to be grownups. Ox passed out cold about 3 minutes after they left and Emi made bead necklaces. I serged up my pencil skirt and Galieth's poofy pants. Both projects just need hemming, which is exciting.

Also, we bought a copy of Plague Inc, Evolved from the Steam summer sale. OMG. You play as a bacterium, virus, parasitic worm, or some other pathogen. Your goal is to destroy humanity. It's entertaining and so very satisfying to see the world turn red as you infect and then kill everyone. There were many evil laughs. At $10, it's hard to go wrong.

Today - Holy crap, but I'm not awake. I don't know what's going on, but I can't get my brain to focus and do work this morning. It's after 11 and I still feel useless at work. I just want to go home and sleep. Maybe walking over for lunch will help. I keep telling myself that if I say I feel bad enough to go home early, I shouldn't go to dance. I want to go to dance. But I also want to go home and sleep.

So I put on my Songs to Make Me Smile playlist and made some deals with myself. I don't know if this is going to work or not.

Blah. Sllleeeeeepy Sabine. I totally have a case of the Mondays.

So storium

Jun. 12th, 2014 09:28 pm
sabine: (Default)
I've gotten well and truly sucked into Storium. I contributed to the Kickstarter and have been extreeeeeeemely pleased with what I've seen in the beta so far. I'm running two games - one's a steampunk adventure for friends and one's called "I spend my reward on ale and...more ale!". It's not to be taken seriously.

One of the things I've done in the latter game is say that each character needs to define a prop. A thing that normally wouldn't impact game play, but in Storium, I can create a card for the object. The player can then use that object to help them out of a bind. 

One of the thieves chose a cursed necklace for his object. This is how I described it on the card:
Poor thief Rhwi had troubles all his own
He had a little necklace that wouldn’t leave his home
He tried and he tried to give the thing away
He sold it to a man going far, far away
But the gem came back the very next day...  

I'm still giggling. And that, right there, will tell you the Kind of Game I am Running.

Now back to our regularly scheduled steampunk mayhem. Yus.



Jun. 9th, 2014 03:05 pm
sabine: (Default)
Friday night was a disaster, due to anxiety about work and other things.

Saturday morning was lovely, due to me actually being rested for once. I did the work that I had to get done, then hovered over the phone for the rest of the day in case something exploded and they needed me.

Since I was hovering and didn't want to start anything (working off the theory that as soon as I did, they'd call and I'd be sad), I started cleaning the den. Downwood started helping out of self-preservation. Ox anti-helped and got banished. Emi said she was helping, but the truth is a bit far from that. I reorganized the piles of books that are on the shelves, but don't actually have homes *on* the shelves. I pulled out all my baby, pregnancy, and breastfeeding books for the GiveAway pile and all my craft books for the Put With Craft Stuff pile. I washed every blanket and pillow that was back in the den, as well as all the winter coats I could find (5 loads, total).

Downwood picked up toys, picked up kid books, and vacuumed.

In the afternoon, Downwood took the kids to the grocery store. I tried to sew and made a mess of things, so I put the projects on the table and read and dozed.

That evening, Emi and I started a new bedtime routine. Now instead of saying "You have 10 minutes left until bed", I say "If you head in right now, we have time for 3 books." And then if she dawdles, I give her the "Two Book Warning". Since she LOVES bedtime books, this is a bigger incentive than me scolding and finally getting her to bed and telling her we only have time for one book. If I give her the choice of "two books or 5 more minutes of video and one book", it seems more fair to her. I think this is reasonable.

Sunday morning, none of us were well rested. Downwood had gone to bed really early, so he was up and about at 4:30 and grumpy about it.

It was a usual Sunday. Downwood mowed, I did a ton of laundry, the kids played outside and whined and snuggled and read books and got in trouble. We played GW2 and I got World Completion on my main character (only impressive if you play GW2, sadly). All was well until bedtime.

I forgot to pick up a refill of one of my evening meds. It's the one that shuts off the hamster wheel in my brain so that I can actually sleep. Without it, no sleep. So I was in bed for about an hour and a half before I finally was able to do more than doze. My Fitbit was unhappy with me this morning. I was unhappy with me this morning.

I've had lots of coffee and have hidden in my office as much as possible. I don't particularly want to talk to difficult people today, as my filters are all wonky.

But there's a YouTube video of Hugh Jackman rapping "The Music Man" at the Tony Awards last night. I have the "Motown Tribute to Nickelback" album on my phone. I did some lovely weird henna on my leg. There are several good new books on my Kindle and I was able to use some of my Amazon credits to buy some good apps for the kiddos. I only work 4 days this week, have a dentist appointment Friday morning, then it's off to Iowa to spend time with my seester and take the kids on a train ride and see Grandpa again.
sabine: (Default)
Sky Pirates of the Caramel Shores continues to chug along. We've finished the first scene and are all getting used to how the system works. I like it as Narrator because I feel like I have more control than a free-form play by email game. Also, there are prepared worlds so I don't have to come up with every NPC, location, obstacle, and reward all by myself. And I get to play with my friends who have moved far away and we don't worry about time zones. Everyone wins!

When some of the worlds that were Kickstarter bonus goals open up, I may canvass the internet for players (or Narrators), as some of the new worlds look Truly Cool.


I started my first Facebook Promotion Thingy. I'm trying to get more visibility on my henna stuff, so I'm doing one of those "Like and Share to Win" gimmicks. I'm against giving Facebook any real money, so my posts don't get shown to many of my followers. Damn corporations trying to make a buck.


Emi's last day of school is tomorrow. I sent her teachers some Thank You gifts today. They're both getting a new beach towel, a shiny magazine (Oprah, so as not to offend anyone or lower my standards), and a bottle of sunscreen. I liked the idea when I saw it on Pinterest because it's practical, consumable, and even if they already have towels and sunscreen, both items have a finite lifespan. I hope it's okay and acceptable to them.


I'm mentally and physically tired. I want to just go home and hide, but know that stress awaits me at home and I was supposed to have a group improv meeting after work today. It looks like that doesn't start until next week, though. It's giving me a chance to dig into farm puns and be silly, so that's cool.


I'm really digging the "Frontier Magic" series by Patricia Wrede. It's alternate history, sort of steampunk, quite magical, and internally consistent. Also, a slightly unreliable narrator (unreliable in that she's young, so she doesn't know what all's going on). I like it. I also like the narration, but I can handle a "country" accent better than others. So that might be off-putting. YMMV.
sabine: (Default)
Overslept and got a late start. Been dragging all day because of it. Emi, Ox, and Downwood had fun on Emi's class trip to the zoo, but left early so they could make it all the way home for dry clothes before going to their allergy appointments this afternoon. Ox discovered the joy of deep puddles. I have a feeling Emi and her friends helped introduce him to that joy.

I didn't refill the emergency Xanax in my purse, so every so often I have to take deep breaths and fight back the tears. This sucks.

Tonight I have dance class. Tomorrow is an aromatherapy scalp massage at the spa that I'll get to use one of my preferred customer cards on. Then it's nothing planned until Saturday when I run my ill-fated Scion game again.

Both kids got through their allergy appointments with flying colors. Their Dr is one of the best in the state (thanks, local university with a med school and teaching physicians!) and we know we're in good hands with him. He called us late in the evening on the Saturday of Christmas weekend a couple years ago because he'd just gotten the test results and wanted to let us know right away. The man's dedicated, is what I'm saying. He's happy with the progress they're making and has no new changes to diet or routine. They'll get eliza-assayed again in November, so until then we just need to keep avoiding the bad food and get the good food in as much as we can. Good stuff.

I woke up the first time to Emi-voice next to my head. Downwood came in and pulled her out of our room, under extreme protest. This let me sleep in probably another hour. It was bliss. We spent a chunk of our tax return on replacing the entire cover of our SleepNumber bed, since Downwood had it long before we were married and it'd collected way more dust, cat, and dog allergens than was healthy for any of us. The new cover is luxurious in comparison to the old one. We have one last bit of pre-dog furniture to replace and one last floor to replace, and the upstairs will be safer for the kiddos.

We had lazy breakfast and I got back to work on laundry. I also sewed up the previously-pinned sections of my dress, pinned new ones, and hemmed/mended three pairs of Downwood pajama pants out of the mending pile.

While Downwood mowed the lawn, I crocheted on the back porch and supervised the kids with popsicles and bubbles. When the mower ran out of gas halfway through the back yard, I brought a picnic lunch to the porch for all of us to share.

In the afternoon, I continued working on the amazing backlog of laundry, put together a Henna page on the Facebooks, and played GW with Downwood and friends. Ox passed out on the couch partway through the afternoon.

Ox got up from his nap as we were sitting down to dinner. His bottle had leaked stinky formula ALL OVER him. All he wanted were Momma snuggles, so Downwood and Emi ate and I held Ox. I couldn't eat dinner at the same time because he was totally stinky and it killed my appetite. As soon as he was done eating, Downwood took Ox off to the bathtub and I tried to eat.

Downwood washed Ox's hair (totally stinky and full of formula). This displeased Ox. He was SO MAD and SO UPSET that he ended up throwing up everywhere. Luckily, he was still in the tub, so it was easy to clean him up. I got him out of the tub, dried off, and in jammas. He played trains with Daddy while I got Emi to finish dinner and get in the tub.

She asked me to get in with her to "make whale waves". I said sure. I washed my face. She washed her face. I scrubbed my body and she scrubbed her body. No mention of anything wrong with either body. It was kind of nice.

We eventually got both kids into bed. I went to bed at my usual time, but then tossed and turned and was TOTALLY AWAKE for 45 more minutes. Usually, my meds knock me out 4-6 minutes after I lay down, so this was upsetting and frustrating and other things. Ugh.

Soccer day! We got up early, got the kids up early, and went over to the soccer fields. Emi is running SO much better than she did last fall. She's keeping up with the other kids now! She still doesn't like being in the middle of the scrum and she doesn't want to run into anyone or have anyone run into her, but she's moving a lot better.

Ox still wants to be out on the field with her. He got tired of Daddy corralling him, so he went over to the mother of a boy on the other team and sat down in her lap! No idea who she is, just that she was sitting there in perfect snuggle position. Luckily, our small town is awesome and she was awesome and we were right there, so it was all okay.

When we got home, I rolled some cones and filled them with the adhesive for glitter henna. It was both a mess and a learning experience. Then I gathered all my stuff and walked down to the studio.

I was there noon to three and only got to henna two people. I did a really good job on them, though, so I felt good about it. I got to read my book, henna myself, and relax without pressure. I need better marketing or something.

I walked home and worked on some laundry. I also read my new book. I'm-a bring it it dance tonight because it's GORGEOUS. Also because there's a cape that Teacher M will drool over.

After dinner, bath, books, and bed, Downwood and I were relaxing when we heard Emi start crying. He went back to check and hollered for help. Emi was throwing up all over the place and was still asleep. I picked her up (ick, but kid) and took her straight to the bathroom while he started pulling all the blankets, sheets, pillows, and stuffies off her bed. She finished throwing up, I got us both undressed, and got us both in the shower. Emi didn't really wake up until I was washing her hair. She was crying and upset and standing there, but not awake. By the time I got her dried off and back in her room, Downwood had the dirty things in the washer and was getting clean sheets on the bed. I got her (and me) into clean jammas, found a clean fuzzy blanket, clean pillow, and second-favorite stuffy animal, and she went right back to sleep.

Shortly thereafter, I went and crashed, too.


Werk, werk, werk. Anxiety, Xanax, anxiety, Xanax.

I escaped work later than I'd wanted and met Downwood and kidz at McD's for dinner. I got huge hugs from the kiddos and we had dinner together. After dinner, I headed over to the East side to go to the MBdA shindig at Tribal S's studio. I don't spend much time on the east side, so it's always an adventure when I get to drive that way.

I got an AMAZING parking spot (by poaching the one that Au had her eye on) and walked in the door only a couple minutes late. We danced to a really fun playlist that RH put together. I henna-ed everyone who was there (all 4 other people). I held the hand of dancer H who was having an anxiety attack of her own and tried to tell her that she's not alone.

I got home late and gave Emi a hug anyway. Downwood had promised her that I'd do so when I got home, so I did. Even though the day had been full of all sorts of awful mental places, dancing and drawing for 2 hours pulled that out of me. It was really nice. Also, maybe someday I'll take lessons from Tribal S. She has some neat ideas about cabaret dancing, good technique, and I think I'd like to learn from her. Also, the next free dance night might be a glow night, which could get more attendees. That'd be cool.

All of last week
Oh gods, werk and anxiety. Things happen at the speed of light and I'm so very tired all the time. My kids are amazing and wonderful, and Downwood's very supportive, but work is eating my soul. I'm doing what I can to resist, but it's hard. Ouch.


sabine: (Default)

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